The Path of Least Resistance

Going with the flow

Image: “Going with the Flow”, Osho Zen Tarot

For years my day-to-day life has felt like an endurance test, requiring all my strength, all my willpower, all my grace. As my health has been improving, I’ve been recovering my energy by actively choosing to go with the flow instead of swimming upstream.

Now this isn’t new – I’ve learned it before. Many times. I’ve been shown how to follow my intuition, trust myself, and choose ease. Then at some point I lose the lesson and need to relearn it. Then I lose it again, rinse and repeat. It’s ok – that’s how she goes. You get hammered by life and lose your way and then you pick it back up again.

But something that’s been helping me really weave this into how I live, think, act, and respond is the idea of taking the path of least resistance.

I’ve been holding the vision in my mind of flowing water. Rivers flow downhill and always take the easiest route. If water hits an obstacle, it simply goes around it – or waits until it’s so strong that the obstacle is no longer a problem. Water is the essence of flow. It naturally finds the path of least resistance.

Taking the path of least resistance doesn’t mean going along with things you don’t want to do, or swallowing resentment, or pretending something is fine with you to avoid conflict. Avoiding conflict does not necessarily mean avoiding resistance. It just looks that way on the outside.

Finding the path of least resistance is always about honesty. Telling the truth is how you love yourself and everyone else.

When a relationship or a situation doesn’t feel good, what’s the truth about how you feel and what you need? Not the truth about what other people need to do differently or how they need to change. The truth about how you feel. The only thing we can ever tell the truth about, is ourselves.

Being honest can feel like the path of most resistance because it’s scary to be vulnerable. It’s easier to focus on the things other people should do rather than saying that we feel small or alone or hurt or unseen or unappreciated. But the truth is probably one of those things, so just acknowledge it.

It’s true that you will feel exposed, and that might be painful. But it doesn’t hold a candle to the toll of pushing a boulder up a hill or sinking into quicksand. It’s terrifyingly easy to get accustomed to guilt and resentment instead of recognizing them for what they really are: your soul’s version of a “check engine” light. Pushing through internal resistance siphons your life force.

When I find myself slipping back into feeling like everything would just be easier if somebody else changed, I flip it and reverse it. If I feel strongly that someone else needs to do something, chances are I probably need to do some version of that thing. It’s a shortcut to figuring out your truth; think about the advice you want to give somebody else, and then see how you can apply that to yourself.

If it feels uncomfortable to start centering yourself, remember that you don’t have to worry about which path anyone else takes, they are also free to take the path of least resistance at any time. True honesty – about yourself, not anybody else – is freeing and empowering. You can change every single relationship you’re in just by changing your half of it.

Of course, going with the flow doesn’t mean everything is always easy. It has nothing to do with avoiding grief or heartache. We encounter sorrow no matter what road we take. But on the path of least resistance, we don’t make it harder for ourselves by ignoring discomfort, minimizing pain to make it more palatable, or prioritizing productivity over recuperation.

The path of least resistance is buoying and inviting. It’s a balloon floating on a breeze. An open door. Honey melting into tea. If you feel stuck, or trapped, or exhausted, ask yourself if how you actually feel is different from how you think you should feel. How often are you saying, “I have to…”?

If you want to be of service, you need to come to life yourself. I love that quote by Howard Thurman:

“Don’t ask what the world needs. Ask what makes you come alive, and go do it. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive.”

You don’t come alive by being a martyr. You come alive when you’re in flow. And you’re in flow when you stop fighting through resistance and trust the truth to carry you.

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